The Blahsies

Sigh....

Gosh, it's been so long I'm not sure if anyone reads my little ole blog anymore (other than my parents :))

but hi!

I feel like I've been gone for forever.  I'm not gonna lie ya'll the last month or so (exluding the holidays) have been less than sweet.

You see, I'm a new nurse.  I graduated last December, but with Josh's job and us moving, I am just starting out in this big bad world of nursing.  And it's been a wee bit overwhelming.  To the point of depression on my part.  Ugh, and I hate feeling like this because I am SO incredibly blessed with my life and the people in it, but boy do I feel down lately.

Maybe it's the combination of a new city, the field of Oncology, the cold, and not having really anyone to lean on other than Josh here. 

But it's bad.  When I come home from work I don't want to move.  When I have days off I can't shake the dread of work and can't enjoy myself.  My poor husband, parents, friends, I know I'm not the happiest to be around and I don't know what to do.

Don't get me wrong, I do have good days at work.  I enjoy my patients (for the most part), and the people I work with, but it's a little more than I can handle at times.  I hear the same respones every time someone asks how it's going....

"Oh, that's normal to feel nervous, overwhelmed, silly, etc. etc." 

"Comes with being a new nurse"

"etc etc"

And I get it....

And

I've read a million times over how normal this is for new nurses....

And

it WILL get better and I will feel more confident in myself.  It will just take time...

But until then I'm trying so desperately to pull myself outta this funk.  For real.

If you're still reading this, I commend you.  I really hate posting depressing shenanigans like this because I really am blessed to have a job....

This too shall pass....

Until then

 

Nutella....you complete me.